Submitted by
Laurel on Mon, 07/11/2011 - 8:59am
Odd how knowing about brain states seems to manufacture kindness.
Her sister had visited her after surgery, stayed for 10 days, and was waited on hand and foot. Then without a thank you, she went home, turned off her phone and wouldn't even speak to her. "How do I deal with THAT?" she said.
I thought about it, given that I haven't had a lot of house guests and the ones I do come and go as they please and make themselves happy. My response: It's just about brain states. A person comes in a whole package: light side (all the good stuff) and dark side (the rest of it). Bring to mind your sister's light side.
She said, "I can't think of anything right now."
I waited. It's odd how every person on earth in Brain State 1 is lovable and how the cascade of stress hormones that ushers in the Brain State 5 makes us all rather hard to take!
She said, "OK, she's strong willed and the dark side of that is that she is demanding and selfish . . . at times."
I said, "Who isn't selfish and demanding when they are at Brain State 5?"
She smiled and said, "I think I'll call my sister. . . ."